night riding

10-something pm. tuesday night.

i felt restless so i grabbed my bike and went out. it seemed almost like a mission; i packed my bag light, attached my lights, tied my hair up, zipped my windbreaker, and threw on my gloves. rolling into the night alone.

the first stop was an empty garage i'd been to once before. maybe ten blocks away. the streets are quiet. there sits one parked car. the floor is dirty, slick, dark concrete that handles you firmly if you slip up. i'm learning to be ambidextrous; i spent a handful of moments skidding, sharpening my bike skills.

the second stop was a cafe a little farther and took a bit longer. it gave me an endpoint and a reason to breathe hard. it's a slight uphill for a few miles but you can carry your momentum through the dips to conserve energy. by the time i got there my shirt was damp and i was thoroughly warmed up. so i took my time and slowed down for a bit. got a tea, sat, thought, and wrote. i asked myself many questions, trying my perceptions, challenging my tendencies. somewhere along the way i found a moment of clarity, an edge through the haze that broadened to become a clearing. i immediately stood up and left. i found what i needed; it was time to go home.

resetting myself in my accoutrements, i set back onto the pavement. it took less than one minute to gather my rhythm, and i was off. i arrived at each light just as they turned green, threading between the cars just as they began to move. i gained speed. the pavement that was smooth, i savored. the pavement that was rough, i floated over with no effort. i pulled left and right for the few cars that passed me, spotting their headlights and hearing their engines well before they pulled forward. i caught and passed them later, at the next lights. i maintained my speed, adjusted my rhythm to the flow of the lights. i never had to stop.

after the last light turned green before my block, i let the muscles in my legs go loose and free. the momentum pulled me the rest of the way. i needed nothing but understanding.